Are you a sharp edge, or a dull edge? READ THIS ARTICLE and find out.
To summarize the main points of THIS ARTICLE:
1. There are two vastly different definitions of "edgy."
2. Which edgy are you: The edgy that asks permission, or the edgy that asks forgiveness?
3. Most of us experience a DISTANCE between the life we lead, and the life we want to live -- the life that reflects our aspirational selves.
(a) Bill's note: "Distance" in Spanish is "trecho" (think of "stretch"), and in Spanish, there is a saying, "Entre el dicho y el hecho hay gran trecho." Basically, this is the Spanish language version of "actions speak louder than words."
4. Both choices have consequences. There is no free lunch! Again, READ THE ARTICLE for details.
Like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, we tend to think that "a good witch" is one who is cooperative (therefore predictable, and therefore dull), and that "a bad witch" is one who does not act in the best interest of others. So what Dorothy is really asking Glinda is whether she is trustworthy. Safe.
Of course, this is no guarantee of anything. After all, just moments prior, Dorothy's house had landed on top of another witch. And what if Dorothy and Toto had landed on Glinda instead? We would be hearing an entirely different moral tale, one that states, in essence, that the universe is random and exists beyond the best interests of others. Do you believe it is? Your answer may reveal a lot about you and the choices you make.
It's as if the Fates decreed, "OK, girl, so you wanna fly Over the Rainbow? It's not all sugar and spice there, despite your fantasy. You will have to break a few eggs before you get to the cake. And once you're there, you might change your mind -- maybe you're kind of a dull edge type." There's no place like home, after all.
As for me, I do think it's important to be considerate of others, yet when push comes to shove, I have been known to take the cake and run with it, without anyone else's say-so. So I guess I am a sharper edge than I like to think I am.
Apparently, then, it is more important to me to take action than to reflect upon the consequences. To make matters worse (or better), I believe my own judgment is usually more reliable than others'. (Okay, almost always.) Unlike a lot of others I have known, I don't tend to complicate matters with unnecessary variables.
Of course, others don't always agree with me that their "variables" are "unnecessary." And therein lies the problem -- mostly for others.
But why take my opinion on that? "You test boundaries," my last therapist told me in 2005. "Mostly you have been unscathed by that."
He didn't mean it as a compliment. And I think it took me a while to realize that.
Yet I live outside of my comfort zone every day. I cannot think of any other way to be me. If I am not constantly testing myself, by pushing my limits (which means I will break some eggs), then I feel diminished.
OK, enough about me. What about you? If you want to simplify life, then a less complicated life is the one that strives for the best possible outcome based on the least necessary effort.
Sometimes, then, it is better to sit still, scan for, and WAIT for the opening, rather than to take the most EXPEDIENT one. So it may be wiser to wait a few days to see if someone corrects a mistake involving you, than to get embroiled in an awkward series of communications before giving the other party a chance to make amends.
Which is a form of asking forgiveness, to use the above article's phraseology. So if you want to be that way, without being a hypocrite, do others deserve less than that consideration and opportunity from you?
Wishing you a beautiful day,
Bill Brent
[this page last updated: 2009.11.04, 5:55 p.m. Hawaii time]
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Keywords for this post: simplify life, trust my judgment, trust your judgement, uncomplicate my life, uncomplicate your life
